I fell on this grenade for you. For you. Never forget this.
Starts with a heartbeat and an acoustic guitar. I shit you not.
All I know
Is everything is not as it’s sold
but the more I grow the less I know
And I have lived so many lives
Though I’m not old
And the more I see, the less I grow
The fewer the seeds the more I sow
It mostly goes on like that, for what seems like about 63 years.
There’s about 96 overdubbed tracks worth of sparkly digital crap and the string sections and the American Idol-style oversinging and the rah-rah-radio supercompression and the maybe they're backup singers or just a flotilla of sampled-autoharmonized clones and the oy please stop oh just please stop it someone.
It seems these two guys, George and Harry, set out in a Hot Air
balloon to cross the United States. After forty hours in the air, George
turned to Harry, and said, “Harry, I think we’ve drifted off course! We
need to find out where we are.”
Harry cools the air in the balloon, and they descend to below the
cloud cover. Slowly drifting over the countryside, George spots a man
standing below them and yells out, “Excuse me! Can you please tell me
where we are?”
The man on the ground yells back, “You’re in a balloon, approximately
fifty feet in the air!”
George turns to Harry and says, “Well, that man *must* be a lawyer”.
Replies Harry, “How can you tell?”.
“Because the information he gave us is 100% accurate, and totally
That’s the end of The Joke, but for you people who are still worried about
George and Harry: they end up in the drink, and make the front page of the
New York Times: “Balloonists Soaked by Lawyer”.